Old Ambitions, New Year

We tend to forget the former vigor of our youth, of what w had for ourselves and others. We become cynics and jaded human beings as life continues to take us down the jagged road.

But we can smooth those jagged edges and plow through the spiked fences and glass shards. We have the power and desire to sweep them all and slide them into the nearest dumpster. I certainly want to and will stop simply saying so and actually putting words into work.

Fall not to conventions but your own convictions. Be honest to yourself, because that honesty is transparent and will not only inspire others, but I believe, in the end, inspire yourself.

A Paper Boat's Dream

By Yours Truly

Do not let the laughter and disbelief of others, affect what you want to do in life. 

Never Forget, You are Never Alone.

Twelve years ago, I lost my best friend.

Today, I live for the both of us. Not a day goes by when I don't think of her, wonder what she thinks of my decisions, and what she would say about my dreams.

All I know is, she is by my side, as I would be by her side with her dreams.

Together, heart in heart, I hope to succeed for the both of us. I hope she can feel my love for her in every thing I do, in every word I write, in every experience I go through.

Sometimes, it feels lonely without her. But I know she is with me. She is always with me, as long as I never forget her.

Us - by Yours Truly

How can I ever forget her?

It's a Beautiful World

Sitting among the petals of wild sunflowers, they tell me, as long as you gaze towards where the sun is shining. The charcoal clouds will disappear. The storm will pass. The skies will be blue again.

While you can feel the sun rays lightly brushing against your skin, you know there is hope.

Sunflowers by Yours Truly

Even when you can't see the sun, even when you can't feel its rays; keep in mind, he is just beyond the clouds, waiting for you to push the clouds aside and embrace the sun.

Dreaming Whales and Puffy Clouds

As I drove down the coastal highway, my windows were rolled down, allowing the fresh afternoon sea air to flow through and embrace me after a long day. It was salty, soothing and a little sad. Cars zoomed passed me, as if trying to get home as fast as possible because their house is on fire. I took my time. I coasted. I let the hills take me however fast they want to.

A marine layer began to come in - cloaking the ocean with a light film of fog, misty and magical. The sky was slowly turning a little pink, some gray with a hint of orange. When I looked up, I saw whales. Swimming among the ocean of clouds, one by one, flipping their tails like children with a towel tied around their necks, pretending to be Superman.

I saw beyond the clouds. I saw beyond the sky. I saw beyond what reality allows me to see.

The whales are real; they dream as I dream. They wait for us to ride upon their sturdy backs through the sea of life and adventure. Sometimes, we may fall off and find ourselves swimming alone around strange creatures around the unfamiliar sea floor. But always, we will always find them again.

Dreaming Whales and Puffy Clouds by Yours Truly

And the whales will find us.

Weekend Musing

My clock read 9:30 a.m. when I first opened my eyes this morning. A simple luxury, spending just a few more minutes in bed without feeling guilty or the need to rush out. The sound of fresh coffee beans grinding announced to the whole world of my awakening - then the wavering scent of homemade Friendship bread (really just a cinnamon loaf) baking patiently in the toaster oven. Soon, the whole apartment smelled like a fabulous bakery.

I pour what most people consider to be the morning's savior into a favorite mug. A piece of bread found its way onto a plate. I turn on my computer.

Simplicity, at times, is simply enough.

The Lamp is Still On

Sometimes, the lamp on my desk remains to be the only one on. In the house, in the neighborhood, in the whole city, in the world. The only sound I hear is the light breathing coming from beneath the warm bed covers, the soft whirling of my computer, and the sprinklers going off at 2 a.m.

Sometimes, it is because I have something on my mind that stops me from finding comfort by closing my eyes. Often times it is because I am too stubborn to sleep - tricking myself into thinking the night is mine, the night is to achieve, the night is to love and think of mad things, write mad things and drink, drink, drink.

Sometimes, I just want to sit and stare. Seeing nothing, feeling nothing, thinking nothing.

Sometimes, often times, the night is friendly and quiet. It is not lonesome. It is peaceful.

It is me.